The only thing I hate about old people is that they tell you not to worry about stuff.
"You're still young. You have time."
The reason this bothers me so much lately is that I have lived for almost an entire year after graduating from one of the best universities and I am, alas, still seeking employment that will actually pay my bills. Why?
Since I'm still young, I guess I'm not afflicted with the finite pressures of time. Or maybe it's just that I have lots more time to waste...
I'm literally at my breaking point. I got an email today from a company that informed me that I was not offered the job, which is fine, because I prefer to know that I'm no longer being considered instead of putting all my fragile little hopeful eggs into a basket of deceit. However, the thing that made my blood boil over it was the cheery and condescending blurb at the end that wished me better luck at the next place I applied to.
Like, thank you?
To add insult to injury, I was reminded that I am stuck living in a dinky town that I loathe with every fiber of my being. Since I'm unemployed (I love my internship, but it is unpaid *ten million tears*), I don't have the resources to get out of this situation. So I have been stalling and feeling perpetually panicked about my life going nowhere (based on my track record, let's be honest).
I have changed my tactics repeatedly and gotten creative with my resources. The sucky thing is, though, that it is all out of my hands--I can't make someone hire me, even though my resume is amazing. I'm a pretty patient person, but I am also driven by intention, so I hate endlessly waiting around. Therefore, twiddling my thumbs and watching job postings for almost a year has been soul-crushingly exhausting for me. (Not to mention that sitting at my computer for hours on end to fill out applications has essentially given me glaucoma and muscle atrophy.)
So I guess you could say my complaint of the day is stalling. I'm 22, single (ugh, don't even get me started), bored out of my freaking mind, and (honestly) pretty disappointed with my life so far. But I am doing the best with what I have, which, I guess, is really all I can do.
Time is this amazingly fleeting thing. It goes by so very quickly and yet we fail to see that until a major milestone passes by, such as looking for a job for over a year. Take some time and regroup, crack open a bottle of wine and relax :)
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